Deacon Dr. Fresh Wine Newsletter

A Wine Newsletter With An Edge - Definitely NOT your typical white bread, mofo, cracker, peckerwood, jank, peckercracker wine newsletter! If this info is too advanced for you, check out my other newsletter: Wine for Dix at

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Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada

World's Lurchest Wine Writer - The Gangsta of the Grape - The Sultan of Shiraz - The Buccaneer of Burgundy - The Prince of Pinot Noir - Yellow Tail's Bane - Locus of the Ladies' Focus - Wielder of the trousered Hammer of Thor - I have arrived to rescue the wine world from overly-serious, rigid, deconstructionist, rooster juice peckerwoods who'd never dream of gettin' a tattoo or crackin' a smile. I am without a doubt, the smartest, funniest and toughest sumbitch in the entire wine industry. And I aint goin' away. All disputes will be settled bare-knuckled in the Octagon. You heard me. Oh, and by the way...Bite me crank!

Monday, June 20, 2011

Fitness, Creekside, Chablis, and the Deacon in Ireland!

Greetings Boozophiles, fanz and friends, homeys and homettes. Your Deacon lubs you! Here's the latest from your Humble Deacon, but first the unedited stream of consciousness rant:

All the rest of you glassy-eyed, under the table texting vaccine addicts can gargle my knotted pseudo-Irish blackthorn shillelagh!

And now the fitness update: Many of you are wondering if your Humble Deacon will cut enough weight to make the Canada Day deadline for the goal of 160 lbs. Well, I'm pleased to announce, your Deacon will make the deadline! Back in April I was firmly ensconced in Fat Bastard Land, carrying almost 183 lbs on my 5' 10" frame. As of this AM, I'm down to 162.2 lbs, which means I have lost over 20 lbs and have only another 2.2 to go in about 12 days, which should be a cinch. So much for you decryers and negative nay-sayers who said it couldn't be done. You might want to examine your own mid-line rolls and write me an apology before your immanent heart attack makes it impossible for you to send me a lavishly simpering and sycophantic email.

In other news: I had the good fortune to attend an amazing Creekside wine and oyster event in the Distillery District a couple of weeks back. Winemaker Rob and his gunslinger/bodyguard Matt kept a wide variety of eksepshunal wines flowing with cheese and nearly unlimited oysters. Creekside is another one of those wineries, along with Henry of Pelham, Stratus and Penninsula Ridge, that I really Respect. A couple of years back I was saying that Shiraz wouldn't do well in Niagara as it needs lots of sun and very little snow and ice. Creekside proved me wrong and made a New World style Shiraz that blew everyone's brains out. Now they're calling it Syrah and are creating a Rhone style wine that's as awesome as a 357 Magnum in a fist fight. Creekside also produces the top tier Wayne Gretsky wines that can skate across your palate like old number 99 himself. If you haven't checked out Creekside lately, buy a case or two. Their Sauvignon Blanc is excellent too, as were all the whites I tried. Thanks for the invite, Creekside! You're makin' some lurch vino.

Then the laughs continued with a visit to the Fine Wine Reserve, where your Deacon is a perennial visitor when we judge the Canadian Ice Wine offerings each spring. I always plan on storing my wine there, but always drink it on the way over. I took the Deaconess with me for a Chablis tasting that was a rare wine treat. Artisanal Wine Imports put on the event and we got to sample some amazing steely and austere Droin Chablis, including 3 Premier Crus and a Grand Cru. For those of you who are still drinking nothing but Malbec, I'll explain further: Chablis is made from the Chardonnay grape in the North part of France. It grows in soil replete with oyster shells, which not surprisingly, makes it a perfect accompaniment for our little half-shell friends. True, you'll pay a premium price; $68.95 for the Grand Cru, but this is a wine that will age spectacularly for another 10 or 15 years. So limit your purchase to a case and then send a bottle or two to your Deacon, as an appropriate thanks for the heads-up...

Finally, let's talk about travel...

My homeboy and mentor, Billy Munnelly is actually running a wine tour of Ireland where you get to spend a week in Lisheen Castle! Yes, an actual castle with our own awesome chef! There'll be day trips, lunch on the coast and evenings in Irish pubs, etc., etc., all delivered with flawless style by Billy and Kato.

Will Billy Munnelly be providing wine?

Does Rose Kennedy have a black dress?

And your Deacon's going! That's right, me and the Deaconess are already booked on the second week (September 12th to 20th). Check out the website for this lurchest of lurch trips. If you've ever wanted to go to Ireland - and who hasn't? - there's no better way than with Billy! Act fast, because the tour's filling up now. There are two possible weeks but each one is limited to 13 people. Yes, 13 a haunted castle! How cool is that? It's an Agatha Bastard Christie novel in the making, and you get to hang with Billy and the Deacon! Book it now, crackers! And don't y'all worry about no ghost. I routinely punch out anyone wearing a white sheet...

See y'all in Ireland.

Stay lurch 

Deacon Dr. Fresh
Ireland Bound

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Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oy, Deacon, to be sure , me and me wee lass will be lookin into joining you and our Billy, in Ireland...being one of the prodigal sons, it sounds like a grand time, I will be tellin the miss's on and on, and of course I like a wee ghost now and then....does Rose Kennedy wear a black dress? Your a wee bit mad , my kind of lad.


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